My recent stillness, due to my pregnancy, has given me plenty of time to dive in my own thoughts and reflect. I’ve been thinking about my life so far and how a series of actions led to a work path somewhat controversial. Work in the arts. Well, Not a big of a deal, if you look from the outside but quite daunting for oneself. As a kid I enjoyed a certain freedom from my family which let me explore my likings and set my dreams. When I was a teenager and starting to form a early point of view I decided, instead of following a more steady work plan based on my parents professions, to study the arts and work in the arts. My choice came to be photography.
This choice was against all odds. Not because art was something we didn’t appreciate. On the contrary, art was not only celebrated in my house but also encouraged. I remember vividly my parents sourcing original works of art but caring less if we still owned only a black and white tv and I’m talking about the eighties, so go figure! To a younger self of mine seemed fitted to follow what my heart was asking for. I said though, this choice was against all odds and I still believe it.
Having no one to ask about the actual difficulties regarding a career in the arts department, my parents’ mild objections never really bothered me. Until it hit me big time. It’s not that I finished my studies and was unemployed. Actually I’ve been working since my graduation taking a one step at a time towards my (what was considered) major goal to shoot for magazines. And I succeed. I saw my work published for major and international titles like Lucky and Vogue as well as domestic titles. What I didn’t consider (at all) was how long would it take me to reach this point in my life and how much money would give me in return. The prize for that goal was quite high to pay and even if it was rewarding at certain moments it was more harsh and unfair most of the time. Having said that, I’m not sure if I would have taken another more safe path in life but I would have done many things differently and I would have prepared myself in order to overcome the obstacles with less scars. Those are valuable realizations that I intend to rely on for the future.
Now, wise but drained from the effort I want to draw my next chapter in a more bulletproof way. I always wanted to work in the arts but now what? I want to explore new possibilities that I didn’t even regard as worthy in the recent past. Life is full of circles and I feel this primary work circle has come to an end. I know a new one awaits and I’m glad I’m able to apply lessons I’ve learned thus far.